120 Pallet

Here it is! [For Aaliyah] I finally took pics and uploaded some swatches of my 120 pallet. Sorry but my digital camera is CRAP, so the pigments of the swatches don't look that good. Generally I'm impressed. The pigments are great. Most of the colors show up vibrantly on my skin tone (MAC NC50). And there are LOTS of colors to choose from....120..DUH! The price for this, in my opinion was cheap. around $25 Canadian off of eBay. I didn't mind spending close to $30 because normally one eye shadow is like $3 for a drug store brand and $15 for a MAC. These are equally pigmented as MAC products. Over all I think it's worth it for a general pallet.

Pros:
- Affordable
- 120 different colors to choose from (there are two blacks, but that can be a good thing)
- Each pot is about the size of a dime
- Shimmer and matte
- Two stacks
- Plastic cover
- Heavily pigments
- Easy to blend
- Lasts longs/ doesn't fade
- Don't necessarily need a base/primer
- Easy to fix broken pots

Cons:
- Breaks easily
- Had a few broken pots from the delivery process
- Pallet pots can messy
- Case is glossy, finger prints show up
- Case isn't very sturdy
- Not something you can fit in your purse. Can't separate the colors. Either take it as a whole or don't take it at all!
- Can only purchase online.



Here are some pictures of the pallet



Some swatches (NC50 Skin Tone, no base/primer)

21st Century Breakdown

The 8th Green Day album 21st Century Breakdown was released on May 15th, 2009, and I haven't stopped listening to it since!

That's the thing about Green Day, Billie, Tre and Mike NEVER fail to impress me. Can I define Punk Rock? Maybe not, but I'm pretty positive Green Day is somewhere in the description! If not, then they should be!

Tracks:

Act 1 - Heroes and Cons

1. “21st Century Breakdown”
2. “Know Your Enemy” [First Released Single]
3. “¡Viva La Gloria!”
4. “Before the Lobotomy”
5. “Christian’s Inferno”
6. “Last Night on Earth”

Act 2 - Charlatans and Saints

7. “March of the Dogs”
8. “East Jesus Nowhere”
9. “Peacemaker”
10. “Last of the American Girls”
11. “¿Viva La Gloria?”
12. “Restless Heart Syndrome”

Act 3 - Horseshoes and Handgrenades

13. “Horseshoes and Handgrenades”
14. “Drama Queen”
15. “Static Age”
16. “21 Guns”
17. “American Eulogy”
18. “See the Light”

As you can see, the track listening has been organized into three "acts", which I personally find brilliant and creative. I believe the total time run on the CD is approximately 65-70 minutes, which is very decent. There isn't so much as an obvious planned story line, but in an MTV interview Billie Joe explained that a story was not their intention. Rather, the plot of the two characters (as seen on the cover of the album) came after the songs were produced.

To be honest, I was worried. American Idiot was (excuse my language) a fucking master-minded work of brilliant art! From instrumentals, to the story line, to Billie Joe's soothing voice. It was everything I loved about music. Because of this, part of me wondered if this new album compared. I was not disappointed. Not only is 21st AMAZING, but it is not over powering Idiot, yet its not below. It's the perfect fit in Green Day's musical history.

Although I think all the tracks are super, a few stand out. Some of my favs: Know your enemy, 21 Guns, and Static.

Now I know people will argue that this is far from Green Day's first few albums. People grow! Things change! GD's been in this business since 1990! That's a long time! New experiences, changes to our world, especially political changes and new circumstances have arose. GD's music finds ways to adapt to that! I personally think this is another epic album. Maybe it's not for everyone, but even if you're not a GD fan, at least check out the lyrics! There are some pretty touching lines!!

Here's a widget with the tracks *Hoping it works*

21st Century Breakdown - Green...

Same-Sex Marriages: My Stance

First of all, for any of you who were actually expecting any intelligence from the Miss U.S.A pageant… SHAME ON YOU!!!

Anyways, moving onto the issue. I won’t bother repeating the whole controversy, because if you haven’t been living under a rock, then you’d know it already.

Gay marriages.

I support them! I don’t have a problem with the gays/lesbians/bisexuals. However, growing up in our society and being a kid who went to public school amongst other young idiots, I can see how people have a problem with it.

Growing up, “you’re so gay” has always been a common insult. In my surroundings, being gay was always seen as something wrong or degrading. It was something that you shouldn’t be or shouldn’t want to be.

Thankfully I grew up and learned that I can question things like this. I’m an atheist, I don’t believe in God or religion. So why should the law be focused around something that over religious “Christian” freaks claim is key in the bible? I’m not Christian. Isn’t the law meant to protect all of us?

I guess for me, my turn around happened when I was asked “well why shouldn’t gays be allowed to get married?” I couldn’t answer it. Why shouldn’t two people who love each other be allowed to get married? If their both consenting adults, then they should have the same rights as a straight couple. Who the hell am I to say someone should have their rights taken away from them?

I don’t believe the Government the right to go behind bedroom doors. I don’t think there should be a ban on gay marriages.

If the government and “concerned” citizens want to focus on bedroom issues, then I think they should pay more attention to the children and families who go to bed cold and hungry because they can’t afford the necessary living conditions.

Gay marriages are legal in Ontario. Canada in general has been accepting of this. However in Ontario alone, 1 of every 6 child is living below the poverty line. I’m sure these numbers are similar or worse in other provinces and states. So why focus so much attention on preventing people from getting married? They’re not hurting anyone! The people who are hurting…they’re hurting because of the economy. The gays are not to blame for that. So leave them alone, and focus on fixing the lives of the citizens who need assistance.

How many more parents need to walk in on their child hanging from their closet? Or get a call from the police saying their child has been murdered? Why? Because their kid is gay? Being gay isn’t what killed them. It’s the ignorance that we pass on that got them killed.

Instead of parents holding up signs protesting against gay marriages, because they’re scared their child is going to become corrupted, they should protest outside their damn school to have more resources for bullying. They should protest for better education. I know we can’t always watch over kids and control what they say or think. But I think more effort can be put into preventing a child from taking their own life. A child should not be murdered by their peers because they’re different.

In all honesty, I see this as another excuse for poor parenting skills. If you want to walk around high and all mighty as a “faithful Christian”, then go ahead. Just don’t destroy human rights.

I disagree with how Miss California answered her question. I believe that Perez Hilton brought up a good point; Miss USA is suppose to represent all Americans, and not alienate anyone. You can still have your opinion while being politically correct.

But again, I was not expecting any intelligence from a pageant.

Some interesting reads:

http://www.psr.edu/news/former-miss-california-defends-same-sex-marriage [Former Miss California contestant's view on same-sex marriage. Provides a better insight to the bible]

http://www.campaign2000.ca/rc/pdf/OntarioReportCard2006.pdf [2006 Ontario report discussing child proverty]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QcMEL3_YsVI [Ellen Degeneres on the Lawrence King tragedy]

http://www.ajc.com/metro/content/metro/dekalb/stories/2009/04/21/boy_suicide_bullying_decatur.html?cxntlid=homepage_tab_newstab

Stop over feeding your kids and leave the cookie monster alone.

Perhaps I'm late on the shenanigans that angry, emotionally unstable mothers have been spewing with the media, but like my period, it's better late than never. Let's face it, at one point or another we've all blamed the media once for something like anorexia, low-self esteem, "why isn't my body like Shakira's" blah blah blah blah. The media is Satan for young girls and boys every where isn't it?

But what about those of us who've never stuck our finger down our throat? Our cut pictures of our head out and stuck them onto Paris Hiltons body. I can't speak for all, but I'm pretty sure it has something to do with how you're raised. Smart parents teach you not to buy into this crap. Smart parents realize that the last thing we need on this Earth are clones of Miley Cyrus and Britney Spears.

But then there are the parents who are just too lazy to be parental. Their there ones that can't stand their bitchy ass whiny kid crying and give in by buying him a big mac combo. Or the ones who don't take the time so sit down and talk about the birds and the bees....then they find out their 13 year old daughter is knocked up.

I would love nothing more than to sit here and rant about the future strippers of tomorrow, but I'm going to stick to childhood obesity.

They let their child live on a diet of nothing but junk food consisting of starch, sugar, fast food and pop. Then they some how manage to find the audacity to blame the cookie monster for their kid being a total fat ass. The cookie monster can eat as much broccoli as his little puppet mouth can handle, but at the end of the day, the damn child is still going to know the cookie tastes better.

Point: He's a puppet.

Anyways. Most parents tend to pack their fridge with endless amount of artery killing crap. They do this because the cookie monster goes grocery shopping with them, holds a gun to their head, and then forces them to buy the jumbo pack of Oreo's.

For your sake, I hope you caught onto the sarcasm.

Here's an idea, they should tell their kids how to get to sesame street, then make them WALK there. Television can only do so much for you. Yes, it can alter their programming to encourage healthy eating and living, but until further technological advancements take place, they won't be able to spoon feed kids through the screen.

But hey, blaming a furry blue monster for cutting their child's live short by a few decades sounds a lot better than blaming themselves right?


I'm unemployed and trying to score a job on the Dr. Phil show. Give me a break.

It took me a while..

But I think I'm finally able to put him into words. A lot of you, most of you....hell...all of you who I've talked about this told me I wasn't in love. It was just infatuation. In a way, you were right. It was infatuation rather than falling in love. However, at one point I was in love.

Before you criticize me and lecture me about my own feelings. Hear me out.

Him. His physically being. Him sitting here. His looks, his smile and his scent. That's where I'm guilty of being infatuated. He gave me those warm bubbly feelings and he made me smile and do those stupid little things like walk into doors (literally). And I liked that feeling.

But I wasn't in love with him. I was in love with the idea of being in love with him. I know that doesn't make much sense to most of you, but it makes perfect sense to me.

All of you told me that he was no good for me. That I could do better, and that I deserve better. And I thought, 'who the hell are all of you to judge a guy you don't even know'? I wanted all of you too see what I saw in him. I wanted you to see what I was in love with.

The problem with that was everything I was in love with...was make believe. I had no idea who he was or who he is now. I was looking so hard to find someone that I could trust and look up too and be all the things that I needed and wanted, that somewhere in my mind I was able to convince myself that he was all that. I thought he was good for me, I thought that he was what I deserved. He wasn't. Everything I saw in him were just the illusions of my imaginations and my need of something to belong to me.

When I finally decided to let him go, all I wanted to do was to write it out. I wanted to put him into words on a piece of paper. I couldn't, and I didn't know why. I was so frustrated because I had all these feelings towards him, yet I couldn't write them down.

Even now there are moments when I feel as though I still have something for him, and it's hard to remind myself that he's not the person I wanted him to be. I still feel anger and bitterness towards him, yet sometimes all I want is to belong to his world...which in time I hope will go away. Maybe I do have some reasons to think he's a jerk. But I don't have any reasons to hate him. After all, I was just using him to fill a gap in my own life. I used him because I felt I needed a replacement for those who I've lost in my life that meant a lot to me. I made him out to be my savior, when in reality, he had no clue what was going on. Maybe there are things in his life that I want. I don't know yet, but I have time to figure it out.

My emotions are still running wild at times. I've learned to move on from friendships that I've lost, because some how I've learned that if someone ever really cared about you, they will always care about you, and although you may not talk to them or see them or consider them a friend, they'll still be there for you. I think I know that because so much time has gone by, things were left unsaid, and will probably never be said. He may not be my friend anymore, but I still care about him, and if he needs me, I there. Vice-versa.

I've fallen down and I've dealt with a lot of pain. For the first time in a long time, I think I'm finally able to stand up. And at least I can say I stood on my own.

“Every day you may make progress. Every step may be fruitful. Yet there will stretch out before you an ever-lengthening, ever-ascending, ever-improving path. You know you will never get to the end of the journey. But this, so far from discouraging, only adds to the joy and glory of the climb.” Winston Churchill

Is there anything bigger than Octo-moms Vagina?

I'm not sure, but I'm guessing it could be the mouth of Kanye West.

When is he ever not talking? Or as I like to see it; When is he ever not trying to suck his own dick? I get it, this man is a musical genius.

Actually, no, I don't get it. 5 years of my life were devoted strictly to the Backstreet Boys, so I'm not qualified to spot out a musical genius. But according to my surrounding public, the man is a genius.

Well according to Kanye, not only is he a musical genius, but he's the best that there is...the very definition of greatness, he is also the vessel for God.

He said:
“God chose me. He made a path for me. I am God’s vessel...But my greatest pain in life is that I will never be able to see myself perform live" (http://news.softpedia.com/news/I-Want-to-See-Myself-Perform-Live-Kanye-West-Says-106010.shtml).

Thankfully I sold my soul to the devil for a 9th season of Smallville and I'm going to hell. Because there is no way I'd be able to put up with him and his mohawk for all eternity in heaven.

Don't get me wrong, I found the whole thing about "George Bush does not like black people" to be very amusing and witty of him. But he probably should have just stopped there. At this point I think he's just an older Jonas Brother with less hair and nothing brilliant to talk about.

I heard 50 cent is moulding a vibrator out of his penis. He should stick a few of them in Kanye's mouth, maybe that will help to solve this problem, or at least keep him busy so that we can all achieve some temporary peace. Kanye, I would love to let you be great. You know? Just let you be great. But that would require you keeping your mouth shut when your not "dropping lines" or what ever the hell they call rapping nowadays.

As for Nadya Suleman, I think think they should stick Miley Cyrus and the cast of High School Musical up her pussy. There's room and it will better society.

OLP- Thief

OUR LADY PEACE - Thief

I don't want to understand this horror
There's a weight in your eyes
I can't admit
Everybody ends up here in bottles
But the name tag's the last thing you wanted

As the world explodes
We fall out of it
And we can't let go
Because this will not go away
There's a house built out in space

I can't see that thief
That lives inside of your head
But I can be some courage at
The side of you bed
I don't know what's happening
And I can't pretend
But I can be your, be your

Someone help us understand
Who ordered this disgusting
Arrangement, time and the end
I don't want to hear who walked
On water, because the hallways are empty
And the clocks tick

As the world implodes
We fall into it
And we can't go home
Because this will not go away
There's a house built out in space

I can't see that thief
That lives inside of your head
But I can be some courage at
The side of you bed
I don't know what's happening
And I can't pretend

It's a long, long get away
It's a long, long get away
Make it home again
Make it home again
It's a long, long get away
It's a long, long get away

I can't see that thief
That lives inside of your head
But I can be some courage at
The side of you bed
I don't know what's happening
And I can't pretend
But I can be your, be your



NOT the official video. fan made =( Youtube didn't have the embedded code for the real video.

For my lovely optimists:

I have no right, absolutely no right to shatter the dreams and hopes of those passionate young ones of our generation. No right at all! But I regret to inform you that most of you have fallen for the hype of what turns out to be another popularity scam. If you're scratching your head wondering what I could possibly be bitching about this time, let me reveal! OBAMA. Yes! His name has graced the world. America's 44th president is a black man. The white house, which was built by African American slaves, now has a black family living in it. Don't get me wrong, we've witnessed a beautiful thing. We've witnessed a great mark in history; an amazing burst of change. For some, we can even gain belief in the saying "you can be what ever you want to be".

So what do I find wrong? The fact that we're giving this man the expectations of a God. He is not a good, he is only man. Hope vs. Reality. I was watching the Dr. Phil show where debates from the liberal and conservative side has been brought up. What I would like to say is this: I do believe that Obama has positive changes in mind. However, changes as such need time. And, we cannot possible expect him to bring us all to saviour. Before, during and after his term as President, there will be homeless people, there will be crime and there will be problems difficult to solve. I don't think most of you understand that. How do we really know this man will solve our problems? You cannot give someone more power than they have. Power, leads to destruction.

Why did so many young people vote for Obama? Was it because they actually listened to his speeches? Was it because they actually knew what he was standing for? Or was it because they made sense of his plans for America?

Or was it because P. Diddy and Madonna walked around in t-shirts saying "Barack the vote"?

Obama had A LOT of support from the rich and famous. But was it because they actually believed, or was it a publicity stunt to get themselves back into the newspapers and magazines and to cash in on the election?

Oh how I hate to bring in race. But those who said "this had nothing to do with race".....are you fucking shitting me? It had EVERYTHING to do with race and gender. Hell! Hilary got attacked during her campaign because her HUSBAND cheated on HER! And she had to suffer the heat of it! Of course they wouldn't let a woman into the white house! How many times have I heard "the first black president" Oh gravy.....and it had nothing to do with race? You mean to tell me that there were not any black citizens who just voted for Obama because oh his race? Really? I don't believe that.

And why is that the conservative side always gets more heat than the liberals? For heavens sake, during the inauguration ceremony, George Bush was booed by some. What the hell is that? We're looking to a brighter, positive future of change, and you're booing a man who's no longer in power. Those are the fools who clearly took nothing from this election.

Was George Bush a shitty president. Maybe. It's not my call to make. Just like it's not my call to say whether or not Obama will make a good president. But I'll say this, I think Bush really did care about the country. Maybe his caring was bias and selfishly focused, but at the end of the day, he is a man with two daughters. He's just a man, like Obama is just a man.

Take what you will of this, and I really do hope Obama can bring forward so bright changes and lead us out of this dark recession.

On turning 21

I'm turning 21 and all that my life consists of is a t.v show, a job I don't like and a school I despise. Hell, the little I do have of my life, I spend it on facebook stalking my driving instructor, who by the way has disowned me to my face. I have no idea what I want out of my future, and I have no idea how to move myself out of this fixed world that I've created on my own. I'm like the planet Krypton, just waiting for self destruction! My center core is rupturing with so many emotions that I think I'm going to explode.

Holly shit, did I say I'm turning 21? I'm an adult now. I'm officially legal to drink and go clubbing in the US (which I have no intention of doing). But hell, I'm an adult. Aren't adults suppose to be mature? Aren't they suppose to make good decisions? I know everyone has their faults and I know everyone makes mistakes, but I feel as though I'm light years away from being mature. I don't even know what it means to be mature. Does it mean putting away the posters that cover your bedroom walls? Or stop calling everyone "dude"? Or stop reading books about vampires and werewolves? Maybe its about making amends with people who you didn't get along with when you were a kid or getting back in touch with that good friend you once had. And instead of those childish trips to the mall, you're suppose to go to coffee shops and talk about politics and other grown up stuff.

As much as I want to live a care free life, I'm going to have to make choices and one day I'm going to have to support myself. This shit terrifies the hell outta me. I don't want to grow up. I like my batman poster and superman movies and I love Smallville and vampire books. I want to live a different life, and I want to grow up and enter the real world, but part of me is too scared the leave my four walls of comfort.

I don't know how to being growing up. I can't do simple things like let go of high school grudges. I can't say things to people who I care about because I can't seem to put my pride aside. I log on to apply for teachers college, and I just freeze. Is that what I want? What else can I do with a freaking sociology major? I've limited myself in the worse possible way. Oh yea, I don't even like kids!!!

Here's what I think it is. I'm too damn lazy. I'm too lazy to fill out those damn forms. I'm too lazy too push myself to be something more. I live my life hoping that everything will just work out and unfold on its own. THAT'S why I'm a sociology major at York. THAT'S why I'm so confused. Laziness and fear. Two evil blood sucking demons!

Oh and on a brighter note, my family implied that my biological clock is now starting to tick so I better get on it. Then they asked me if I want to celebrate my 21st. HA!! The beginning of the end is starting and they want me to call on a celebration???? I think not :|

Pondering 2oo8

"It is one of the blessings of old friends that you can afford to be stupid with them."- Ralph Waldo Emerson


Fixed, boring, dead conversations. Really, I hear the crickets chirping under the ground, under the 20 centimeters of snow.

Same thing, same questions. Their either lifeless and humorless, or just really disgusting.

It's not that I don't know what a good conversation is, because I do. I use to have them, but they seem so long ago. So long ago that I can't even remember what the hell they were about. However, I do remember that I enjoyed them, and that I miss them.

You can try so hard to keep a balance of liveliness and humor. You can put all this effort into keeping the other person captivated. That's where the problem is; when you have to try, it isn't there.

If there's one thing I've learned over the course of 2008, it's that you can't force friendship, and you can't force something that isn't there. You can lie to yourself and pretend that things are the way you want it to be, but really, you're just kidding yourself in the end.

Friendship comes naturally, you either bond with someone, or you don't. That's why best friends are best friends, they know what to say to each other. They know when to be harsh and when to be sympathetic. Their the ones who you can get into a fight with, and make up with without having to say a word.

I'd like to believe in what I'm rambling about, and for the most part the friendships that I've had over the years have proven my theory to be right. Yet I still question this, because what about that one friend who you told everything too? The one who you spent hours on the phone with every night just talking about stuff? Like just stuff...anything and everything? What happens when you fall apart from them and you can't seem to find your way back? How does that happen? You have this bond with someone for over 5 years, then it feels like they've disappeared. But they haven't gone anywhere, they're right where they always were, you just can't bring yourself to say what you need to say to them. Does this void the whole friendship theory? Or is it just an exception? Can you try to make the friendship come back? If you put effort will it be the way it was before? Or is what you once had gone forever?

How often do we let that one special person go? People around you have these ideas of what the two of you are. Some people try and break that apart, and even succeed. Then their the ones who give advice on how to fix things, but hell, if it were so easy don't they think it would have been done already? I'm holding back on saying what needs to be said, because I'm terrified of trying. I don't want to try, I want it to be there. I want to just be able to say "hey, long time", and have everything be alright again.


You can speak over and over again, but you'll never be heard until someone listens.

Untitled.

"I believe everything happens for a reason! People change so you can learn to let go, things go wrong so that you can appreciate them when they're right, you believe lies so that you will eventually learn to trust no one but yourself, and sometimes, good things fall apart, so better things can fall together"
-Marilyn Monroe

Reposted quote? I'm not sure, but I'm not in the mood to care =)

Jesus Christ. I fell in love with my driving instructor. I don't get it, was I this in love with him when I did the in class shit? WAS I?? Ugh no, I don't think so. I wasn't THIS crazy. I had a small simple crush, but hell, after my first lesson with him, he was ALL that I thought about. So now, I want to key the bastards car. I mean, does he get a kick out of having girls fall for him then blowing them off? Does he enjoy giving false hopes? I think he does! I should have known better. When I read his facebook profile and it said that he was in a relationship, but under religious belief it said "I'm single", I should have taken that as a red code. It was the total "OH NO!! BACK AWAY!!!" alarm, just screaming to me, but I failed to listen and jumped right into the fire. I could have done lesson with his mom, and quite possibly passed my G, but instead I chose to go with the "real loser" (words chosen by my mother after he missed out first lesson the first time around). Not only did I screw up that first time, but I went straight back into the second time.

Now here's what grinds my gear. Tuesday night, lets give the exact date. Tuesday, October 28th, 2008 between 8 and 9pm. I would have honestly considered that one of the best--actually, no, THE best night of my life. I felt like...me. We talked we shared things, and he made me feel all warm and bubbly despite it being fucking cold outside. But I don't think I felt like me, because when I'm with him, I try to be everything but me. Maybe that night I was more like myself, but not completely. Hell, I don't know. Anyways, Prince charming is a high-school drop out, who will most likely be doing that same job for the rest of his life. Unless by chance he turns into a star soccer player, which I highly doubt, but for the sake of being proven wrong, I won't totally dismiss yet. I don't understand how that night could have been so....touching and so connected that he could totally forget our lesson the next day...and the one the day after that... and then not even bother to call me for my test. Jerk? Yes. Jerk.

Then me being the stupid loser that I am, decides to stalk him. No, not my brightest moment, but it's what I do. I waited out there for TWO HOURS. Bored out of my mind, just waiting. Anyways when he finally SAW me, he drove right past me. Nice. Reallyyyyy nice. The thing is, how can I be mad at him when I set myself up for that? He's had his own life before me, he clearly has one after me. Hundreds of girls probably walked in and out of that driving school with the same crush that I've had. Maybe not as bad, but he's seen those puppy eyes before. In my head I made him out to be the one, which he isn't.

To make matters worse, I'm still sitting here imagining what my life could be like with him in it. I imagine it as if he's the perfect guy I picture in my head.

Another yr of misery

*sigh*
Yet another year of York and endless hours of boring brutality. This year, much like all the others, started off to a bad start. Not that I'm surprised. My webct still isn't up and running, I'm totally lost already as to what I'm suppose to do for most of my assignments and I have some of my books yet. Not that they're worth buying them. The work load for some of these courses are nothing less than ridiculous, so like, what the fucking hell am I paying 6,100 for?? I'm less than thrilled.

Things at work haven't lightened up much either. The wicked witch is back and she's still a bigger bitch than ever.

I think I need to continue this later :( damn class!

The Dark Knight: My Review

Why so serious? Because the Dark Knight was nothing less than amazing! It was written, directed and promoted beautifully. Despite the tragic death of Heath Ledger, the master minds did an excellent job of dropping teasers for this film. Of course Heaths death created much more buzz and influenced a lot of people to see it, however the movie it's self had a well respected calling. I must say, the choice of actors, the amount of emotion, action and humor was just right! The images, scenes and sound effect were real, intense and captivating!!!

I've never paid attention to Christian Bales work; I'm not even able to list past work that he's done. I guess it's fair to say that I've gone into this movie with an unbias opinion of him. My expect ions however were still high, after all, I've been anticipating this movie for about a year! Bale did not disappoint me! As Bruce Wayne, he perfectly produced that wealthy, arrogant playboy that DC comics intended him to be. He was slick, smooth and his witty charm made me melt! As the Dark Knight...WOW!! His deep, raspy voice reflected Batman's dark mood. With his face being covered, we had to depend on his body language and voice, and let me tell you, I got every word! The confusion, the betrayal, the lust for love and the passion for justice were so beautifully portrayed through his actions. There's no doubt about it, Bale put on that costume, and he BECAME the Dark Knight! I've seen mostly all the Batman movies, and I have to say, Bale is by far the best one to put on that suit! He took this role seriously and he performed it spectacularly!

Heath Ledger (RIP) is another star who I've never paid much attention too. I've only seen one of his other movies (10 things I hate about you) and I wasn't too impressed. I hate to say it, but I thought his role might be over exaggerated due to his death. I was proven wrong with a big slap on the face! His performance was spectacular! The way he smacked his lips and flipped his hair just made me want to jump into the movie! His voice, body language and plot was beyond amazing. His story line had so many twists and turns that there was never a dull moment in the film. While Batman and Harvey Dent/Two-Face were trying to figure him out, the audience was too! They gave us no real background on the Joker so the writers had a lot to play around with. I don't want to risk ruining the movie for anyone who hasn't yet seen it so I won't describe my favorite Joker moments in the film, however I will say that it involves a nurses uniform and school buses! I really do love his performance and along with Jim Carey as the Riddler (Batman Forever 1995) he's my favorite villain!

The love story of this film was your typical bitter-sweet charade that you'd expect from a super hero movie. Typical and obvious, but not disappointing! Again I won't risk giving anything away, but this plot shows what love will make you do. It will also show the great sacrifices that a hero would make. Maggie Gyllenhaal wasn't a favourite of mine, and she wouldn't have been a choice of mine for this movie, but again, I was wrong! She portrayed the past love interest of Bruce Wayne gracefully. Her emotions felt real and she had me convinced. Her relationship plot with Harvey Dent and her death scene was well written into the movie. It connected with the several other story lines that were happening. Aaron Eckhart's (Havey Dent/Two-Face) transition was brilliant. Watching him turn from a hero to dying an almost villain was captivating and moving to watch.Over all, this was a BRILLIANT film. It captured Batman; not the batman played by emotionless actors from the past batman movies, but the Batman and Bruce Wayne that DC comics created to inspire justice. This is by far one of my favorite movies, and I consider it to be the BEST Batman movie ever. I left that theater feeling inspired and loving our masked, spandex hero's more than ever.

"You either die the hero, or live long enough to see yourself become the villain"

The Boulevard of Broken Dreams

Hello betrayal, so we meet again. Is the grass greener on my side? It must be, you come here too often and stay for too long. I must say, you've over stayed your welcome. But really, why would I want to send away the one constant thing in my life that has an automatic replay function?

In all good time, so they say. Take it one day at a time, it will get easier. I should not scrutinize these very words because they're the same ones I've use upon others. I will however admit that it's a lie. Yes I've lied. If I had told you that it will get easier then I apologize, because the road to recovery is nothing by a broken roller coaster sending you on the most thrilling, frightening ride of your life. If you're lucky, you get off unharmed with no wounds. I have yet to meet this miracle.

Five months have passed. I'm ok, but I'm not great. I have moments where I pick up the wrong card in the game and I get sent back to Go. I move backwards in a sudden swing and I find myself where I was to start with. Then there are the day when I'm so close to Finish and winning the game, but I can never quite make it because there is always something holding me back.

I miss the innocent years where simple things were simple and had very little meaning. Take a road for instance. Your five year old self saw them all as the same, maybe one of two had Mac Donalds on them, but other than that, they were the same thing. The path that took you from one place to another.

Then you blow out your 16 candles. That road then becomes something with a name and many purposes. It's either the right road, or the wrong road. The road that will take you to somewhere you need to be, or want to be, or don't want to see at all. You have to worry about the stop signs, crossing signs and speeding signs. This is road is now a destination taking you somewhere, but you need to get there taking precaution. You're surrounded by other drivers and other people. You have rules to follow. To the over paranoid, this road could be the road that leads you to your end, because one false move can cause you too loose your life.

Knock, knock.

Who's there?

Reality.

And it sucks.

I've dreamt of having life simple. Not the dream of being rich and famous, but the dream of having everything already sorted out for you. The dream of not having to worry about your next move. The dream of where things can be left unsaid because they do not need to be said. But the truth is, I didn't say what I needed to say and he didn't say what he needed to say. Now we're here. I didn't take the steps that I should have taken, and I quite possibly missed out on my happily ever after.


My Road is, the Boulevard of Broken Dreams.

RAWR

Another long, boring, dreadful, stressful, annoying, disappointing day at work! One of many from before, and one of many more to come! Joygasm! RAWR. I need to rant, and scream and slam my head against something hard. BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH. AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH. FUCKITY FUCKITY FUCKITY!

BITCHES. BITCHES. BITCHES.


WHORES WHORES WHORES.

Sweet nibblets!

Yes, I took my subject line from the Hannah Montana show. IT'S NOT MY FAULT BILLY RAY IS SO ADORABLE! Heh. I found myself being pathetic again. However, it's become such a constant theme in my life that I've just learned to accept it.

Soooo, about my job. In sum, let's just put it this way, I like the job. Actually, I really like the job. Now let me the define what I mean by job. I mean that I like doing the work. The work is easy, and appealing and I enjoy it. Although at times it can be overly busy, it is rather easy and it doesn't take long to get use to. So what am I always whining about? It's the people whom I don't like! They annoy me, and I don't feel as though I'm being treated fairly compared to the other girls. I also find it rather disgusting how someone who I've helped so brutally turned their back on me and can be so damn ungrateful. But what ever, that has moved on.

As aggravating as this job is, I owe it to myself to hold it off for a bit longer. The pay isn't good, and the people are even worse, but it is experience that I need. REALLY need. Also, finding a job and landing it on your own here in Toronto isn't exactly easy. You need to know someone or have at least three years of experience in the same field. It's only been a month so far, the least I could do for myself is hold it off for six months or so, or maybe even a year. After that maybe something else will come by. I'm hoping to get into a bank, but I doubt that will happen. OH WELL.

I should force my ass to bed and pray for some sleep. Early morning and a 6.5 hour shift. BLAH. I could blog about having a whole week of mom free zone, but really, theres nothing much to talk about. I've been bored and I've done nothing. It's pretty much the same thing with her being here. So honestly, I haven't noticed any difference. She'll be back before I know it. Shoot me.

I wish I had something brilliant to start this blog off with, or to end it with. But I don't. So if any one actually forced themselves to read this brutal shit... this is the least I can offer you.
Enjoy!

I'm always one to be easily intrigued by the humor of cheesy chick flicks. It's been months and I've need to cry for ever, but the tears just wouldn't seem to come. That was until I watched the sisterhood of traveling pants. Lame movie, not very realistic at all in terms of having real friends in the real world, but still however very touching.

I'm attempting to think of something witty to write about in my normal dry, sarcastic manner. But I'm at a loss of words. Also, I don't want to risk sounding any more repetitive like my last few blog entries which I dare not read.

Good riddance till a better story comes along.

Dear Disney: Pls stop producing rich whores

Miley Cyrus is a cute as a button. She's not very talented...but with help from fancy voice editing...she can produce a few good songs. And her annoying personality gives off the persona that she can act. I'm sure it's fun for Disney fans to watch her and Lily get themselves into the same repetitive shenanigans, and I even have to admit...some episodes are quite catchy.

BUT DAMN IT DISNEY....CAN YOU TONE IT DOWN JUST A BIT?????????

"You get the limo out front
Hottest styles, every shoe, every color

Pictures and autographs
You get your face in all the magazines"

So, these stars claim that they're encourage kids to be what ever they want to be, that they can be anything they put their mind too. Well, I think they should just cut the crap. With song lyrics like that do you really think kids are thinking about becoming doctors? Hannah Montana is fully glamorizing the famous life. It's all about being rich and famous. (I know this isn't the only show that does this...but I'm only using it as an example) I've listened to a few of this kids songs...most of them, like her show...is just about her bragging about her wonderful glamorous life. Normally I know I shouldn't be bothered by this, but when my younger sister thinks that in order to be something in this world you'll need a blond wig and shiny clothes...then I get concerned.

This Vanessa Hudgens chick takes nudes photos, and instead of Disney letting her go...they renew her contract???? For another 3 sequels of HSM (which SUCKS)?? Gotta love how they're teaching children about consequences for your actions.

I know the photo's of Miley that I posted aren't "that bad" or they aren't "as bad" as Vanessa hudgens, HOWEVER...they're still bad. I know that I wouldn't want my younger sister taking pictures like that. I understand that Miley Cyrus isn't the only 15 year old girl to take pictures like this. I've seen several like this on myspace. But if this kid is so on top of the world...shouldn't she be raised to have better judgment?

Maybe I'm old fashion. And maybe I'm over reacting, but I can't help it. I grew up watching shows like Fullhouse, family matters and the fresh prince...I think my generation of television got the upper hand compared to my sister. She's only 7, so I'm trying to protect her young mind as much as I can. I'm just amazed at how much money these kids make for being mindless, unoriginal and having poor judgment.

They aren't talented. They're sick capitalists.

There are some who become who they want to be, or who they're suppose to be just seconds before taking that last breathe. It's that moment of knowing that you'll never be able to say out loud the things you've always wanted to say to the important people in your life. That specific moment is when your whole life seems to flash by you, and you either feel joy or regret. There are also those who that encounter that brush of death, but some how, life finds a way to grab onto their hand and pull them back to reality. Some claim that an experience as such can change ones life. It can open windows that leads to making the right choices.

"Whatever comes our way, whatever battle we have raging inside us, we always have a choice...It's the choices that make us who we are, and we can always choose to do what's right." Spider-man 3

Brilliant, inspiring words, but are they easier said than done? How can we stop ourselves from making a bad choice when we're so deeply embedded in our anger and rage? What do we require in order to pull us away from the darkness?

We'd all be in denial if we said we haven't done anything that we're not proud of. Let's face it, we've all said or done things that we regret or we make mistakes that could have been avoided. But how do we justify them? Or, how do we go about forgiving ourself and learn to accept that some things are out of our reach, therefore we cannot change them?

How do we know what the right thing is? Super hero's make it look easy, but what's the reality behind it? Clark Kent could kill Lex Luthor in the blink of an eye. Spider-man can rob banks and become an over-night billionaire. So what stops them? How is it so simple for fictional characters to want to use their power for good and not evil, yet we live in a reality where power corrupts and people get hurt?

I'm not scrutinizing humanity on the whole. There are great men who've walked before us and who walks among us. They've done great things, and they continue to do great things. They're the ordinary humans who save lives on a daily basis and put others before themselves.

That leaves me to wonder. Is there really evil in this world? Do the dictators who have many suffering below them want to be the way they are? What about me? What about my friends and my family? What about you? Or the strangers you encounter everyday? Do we all have a bit of Clark Kent hidden somewhere in us? What about the ones who takes the lives of others? Are they truly evil, or do they hope to one day be the person who many would admire?

I look at my own life and question some of the actions that I've made. I can't justify the bad choices, but I do wish I could go back in time and change the things that I've done. We all have our moments of inspiration where we want to do good in the world. So how is it that anger and rage can over power this?

Just a thought

"Lunch in a bowl: I don't love you." - Jonathan Safran Foer

Is it possible to love someone with out loving them? What I mean is, is it possible to still love someone who you've ended a relationship with and never want to see or hear from again? Is it possible to love and hate one person?

The truth is, as much as I would like to believe that I've moved on from him, and discarded him from the pages of my life; I haven't. If you read between the lines, he's there! I know it may seem like my world revolves around him from what I blog, but you have to bare with me and keep in mind that I only blog when I feel of rush of reminiscence coming over me. That and I have nothing else to write about other than Smallville.

Maybe it's because things ended so weirdly. Yes, I must admit I was first to erase him from my life, but he was not giving me much of a choice. I felt as though he was avoiding me, and that he just didn't want to speak to me. I couldn't keep in contact with him, because had I did, I would have never fell out of love with him. Hmm, I think I just answered my own question. I love him, but I'm not in love with him.

There's not much more that I can do other than sit here and wonder. In good time, if he allows me too, my relationship with him will be nothing more than a faint, distant memory; a beautiful one.