So this is why University student commit suicide!

I bored. Literally. My courses seem so 'blah'. I don't know what happened to all the motivation I once had back in high school. It seems to have all gone out the window. Back in the days I use to put effort in my work, I use to go the extra mile and I was never satisfied with anything under an 80. Now it seems as though I only care about getting by. 'It doesn't matter, just as long as I pass' this seems to be my new phrase. I don't know what has become of myself. I don't know what I want to major in. Sure, Sociology is easy, but I think that's the problem. It's not motivating me to open my text book and actually read what’s in it. I was looking into psychology, but who am I kidding? I'll need to take a math course...and we all know how wonderful I am with numbers. I think part of me is also scared of a challenge. I'm scared that I'll try my hardest and put my effort in but I won't succeed. Yesterday when I found out that I need a 4.25 to stay in honors, I almost had a heart attack. I can't possible be getting anything close to that. I think my gpa is 4.0 or lower. Not only might I get kicked out of University, but I'll be the biggest disappointment to myself. Last night I just cried, but I really wanted to scream. It sucks when you have to hold in anger and frustration and put on your happy face just too keep your family happy and in the dark.