Stop over feeding your kids and leave the cookie monster alone.

Perhaps I'm late on the shenanigans that angry, emotionally unstable mothers have been spewing with the media, but like my period, it's better late than never. Let's face it, at one point or another we've all blamed the media once for something like anorexia, low-self esteem, "why isn't my body like Shakira's" blah blah blah blah. The media is Satan for young girls and boys every where isn't it?

But what about those of us who've never stuck our finger down our throat? Our cut pictures of our head out and stuck them onto Paris Hiltons body. I can't speak for all, but I'm pretty sure it has something to do with how you're raised. Smart parents teach you not to buy into this crap. Smart parents realize that the last thing we need on this Earth are clones of Miley Cyrus and Britney Spears.

But then there are the parents who are just too lazy to be parental. Their there ones that can't stand their bitchy ass whiny kid crying and give in by buying him a big mac combo. Or the ones who don't take the time so sit down and talk about the birds and the bees....then they find out their 13 year old daughter is knocked up.

I would love nothing more than to sit here and rant about the future strippers of tomorrow, but I'm going to stick to childhood obesity.

They let their child live on a diet of nothing but junk food consisting of starch, sugar, fast food and pop. Then they some how manage to find the audacity to blame the cookie monster for their kid being a total fat ass. The cookie monster can eat as much broccoli as his little puppet mouth can handle, but at the end of the day, the damn child is still going to know the cookie tastes better.

Point: He's a puppet.

Anyways. Most parents tend to pack their fridge with endless amount of artery killing crap. They do this because the cookie monster goes grocery shopping with them, holds a gun to their head, and then forces them to buy the jumbo pack of Oreo's.

For your sake, I hope you caught onto the sarcasm.

Here's an idea, they should tell their kids how to get to sesame street, then make them WALK there. Television can only do so much for you. Yes, it can alter their programming to encourage healthy eating and living, but until further technological advancements take place, they won't be able to spoon feed kids through the screen.

But hey, blaming a furry blue monster for cutting their child's live short by a few decades sounds a lot better than blaming themselves right?


I'm unemployed and trying to score a job on the Dr. Phil show. Give me a break.

It took me a while..

But I think I'm finally able to put him into words. A lot of you, most of you....hell...all of you who I've talked about this told me I wasn't in love. It was just infatuation. In a way, you were right. It was infatuation rather than falling in love. However, at one point I was in love.

Before you criticize me and lecture me about my own feelings. Hear me out.

Him. His physically being. Him sitting here. His looks, his smile and his scent. That's where I'm guilty of being infatuated. He gave me those warm bubbly feelings and he made me smile and do those stupid little things like walk into doors (literally). And I liked that feeling.

But I wasn't in love with him. I was in love with the idea of being in love with him. I know that doesn't make much sense to most of you, but it makes perfect sense to me.

All of you told me that he was no good for me. That I could do better, and that I deserve better. And I thought, 'who the hell are all of you to judge a guy you don't even know'? I wanted all of you too see what I saw in him. I wanted you to see what I was in love with.

The problem with that was everything I was in love with...was make believe. I had no idea who he was or who he is now. I was looking so hard to find someone that I could trust and look up too and be all the things that I needed and wanted, that somewhere in my mind I was able to convince myself that he was all that. I thought he was good for me, I thought that he was what I deserved. He wasn't. Everything I saw in him were just the illusions of my imaginations and my need of something to belong to me.

When I finally decided to let him go, all I wanted to do was to write it out. I wanted to put him into words on a piece of paper. I couldn't, and I didn't know why. I was so frustrated because I had all these feelings towards him, yet I couldn't write them down.

Even now there are moments when I feel as though I still have something for him, and it's hard to remind myself that he's not the person I wanted him to be. I still feel anger and bitterness towards him, yet sometimes all I want is to belong to his world...which in time I hope will go away. Maybe I do have some reasons to think he's a jerk. But I don't have any reasons to hate him. After all, I was just using him to fill a gap in my own life. I used him because I felt I needed a replacement for those who I've lost in my life that meant a lot to me. I made him out to be my savior, when in reality, he had no clue what was going on. Maybe there are things in his life that I want. I don't know yet, but I have time to figure it out.

My emotions are still running wild at times. I've learned to move on from friendships that I've lost, because some how I've learned that if someone ever really cared about you, they will always care about you, and although you may not talk to them or see them or consider them a friend, they'll still be there for you. I think I know that because so much time has gone by, things were left unsaid, and will probably never be said. He may not be my friend anymore, but I still care about him, and if he needs me, I there. Vice-versa.

I've fallen down and I've dealt with a lot of pain. For the first time in a long time, I think I'm finally able to stand up. And at least I can say I stood on my own.

“Every day you may make progress. Every step may be fruitful. Yet there will stretch out before you an ever-lengthening, ever-ascending, ever-improving path. You know you will never get to the end of the journey. But this, so far from discouraging, only adds to the joy and glory of the climb.” Winston Churchill

Is there anything bigger than Octo-moms Vagina?

I'm not sure, but I'm guessing it could be the mouth of Kanye West.

When is he ever not talking? Or as I like to see it; When is he ever not trying to suck his own dick? I get it, this man is a musical genius.

Actually, no, I don't get it. 5 years of my life were devoted strictly to the Backstreet Boys, so I'm not qualified to spot out a musical genius. But according to my surrounding public, the man is a genius.

Well according to Kanye, not only is he a musical genius, but he's the best that there is...the very definition of greatness, he is also the vessel for God.

He said:
“God chose me. He made a path for me. I am God’s vessel...But my greatest pain in life is that I will never be able to see myself perform live" (http://news.softpedia.com/news/I-Want-to-See-Myself-Perform-Live-Kanye-West-Says-106010.shtml).

Thankfully I sold my soul to the devil for a 9th season of Smallville and I'm going to hell. Because there is no way I'd be able to put up with him and his mohawk for all eternity in heaven.

Don't get me wrong, I found the whole thing about "George Bush does not like black people" to be very amusing and witty of him. But he probably should have just stopped there. At this point I think he's just an older Jonas Brother with less hair and nothing brilliant to talk about.

I heard 50 cent is moulding a vibrator out of his penis. He should stick a few of them in Kanye's mouth, maybe that will help to solve this problem, or at least keep him busy so that we can all achieve some temporary peace. Kanye, I would love to let you be great. You know? Just let you be great. But that would require you keeping your mouth shut when your not "dropping lines" or what ever the hell they call rapping nowadays.

As for Nadya Suleman, I think think they should stick Miley Cyrus and the cast of High School Musical up her pussy. There's room and it will better society.

OLP- Thief

OUR LADY PEACE - Thief

I don't want to understand this horror
There's a weight in your eyes
I can't admit
Everybody ends up here in bottles
But the name tag's the last thing you wanted

As the world explodes
We fall out of it
And we can't let go
Because this will not go away
There's a house built out in space

I can't see that thief
That lives inside of your head
But I can be some courage at
The side of you bed
I don't know what's happening
And I can't pretend
But I can be your, be your

Someone help us understand
Who ordered this disgusting
Arrangement, time and the end
I don't want to hear who walked
On water, because the hallways are empty
And the clocks tick

As the world implodes
We fall into it
And we can't go home
Because this will not go away
There's a house built out in space

I can't see that thief
That lives inside of your head
But I can be some courage at
The side of you bed
I don't know what's happening
And I can't pretend

It's a long, long get away
It's a long, long get away
Make it home again
Make it home again
It's a long, long get away
It's a long, long get away

I can't see that thief
That lives inside of your head
But I can be some courage at
The side of you bed
I don't know what's happening
And I can't pretend
But I can be your, be your



NOT the official video. fan made =( Youtube didn't have the embedded code for the real video.

For my lovely optimists:

I have no right, absolutely no right to shatter the dreams and hopes of those passionate young ones of our generation. No right at all! But I regret to inform you that most of you have fallen for the hype of what turns out to be another popularity scam. If you're scratching your head wondering what I could possibly be bitching about this time, let me reveal! OBAMA. Yes! His name has graced the world. America's 44th president is a black man. The white house, which was built by African American slaves, now has a black family living in it. Don't get me wrong, we've witnessed a beautiful thing. We've witnessed a great mark in history; an amazing burst of change. For some, we can even gain belief in the saying "you can be what ever you want to be".

So what do I find wrong? The fact that we're giving this man the expectations of a God. He is not a good, he is only man. Hope vs. Reality. I was watching the Dr. Phil show where debates from the liberal and conservative side has been brought up. What I would like to say is this: I do believe that Obama has positive changes in mind. However, changes as such need time. And, we cannot possible expect him to bring us all to saviour. Before, during and after his term as President, there will be homeless people, there will be crime and there will be problems difficult to solve. I don't think most of you understand that. How do we really know this man will solve our problems? You cannot give someone more power than they have. Power, leads to destruction.

Why did so many young people vote for Obama? Was it because they actually listened to his speeches? Was it because they actually knew what he was standing for? Or was it because they made sense of his plans for America?

Or was it because P. Diddy and Madonna walked around in t-shirts saying "Barack the vote"?

Obama had A LOT of support from the rich and famous. But was it because they actually believed, or was it a publicity stunt to get themselves back into the newspapers and magazines and to cash in on the election?

Oh how I hate to bring in race. But those who said "this had nothing to do with race".....are you fucking shitting me? It had EVERYTHING to do with race and gender. Hell! Hilary got attacked during her campaign because her HUSBAND cheated on HER! And she had to suffer the heat of it! Of course they wouldn't let a woman into the white house! How many times have I heard "the first black president" Oh gravy.....and it had nothing to do with race? You mean to tell me that there were not any black citizens who just voted for Obama because oh his race? Really? I don't believe that.

And why is that the conservative side always gets more heat than the liberals? For heavens sake, during the inauguration ceremony, George Bush was booed by some. What the hell is that? We're looking to a brighter, positive future of change, and you're booing a man who's no longer in power. Those are the fools who clearly took nothing from this election.

Was George Bush a shitty president. Maybe. It's not my call to make. Just like it's not my call to say whether or not Obama will make a good president. But I'll say this, I think Bush really did care about the country. Maybe his caring was bias and selfishly focused, but at the end of the day, he is a man with two daughters. He's just a man, like Obama is just a man.

Take what you will of this, and I really do hope Obama can bring forward so bright changes and lead us out of this dark recession.

On turning 21

I'm turning 21 and all that my life consists of is a t.v show, a job I don't like and a school I despise. Hell, the little I do have of my life, I spend it on facebook stalking my driving instructor, who by the way has disowned me to my face. I have no idea what I want out of my future, and I have no idea how to move myself out of this fixed world that I've created on my own. I'm like the planet Krypton, just waiting for self destruction! My center core is rupturing with so many emotions that I think I'm going to explode.

Holly shit, did I say I'm turning 21? I'm an adult now. I'm officially legal to drink and go clubbing in the US (which I have no intention of doing). But hell, I'm an adult. Aren't adults suppose to be mature? Aren't they suppose to make good decisions? I know everyone has their faults and I know everyone makes mistakes, but I feel as though I'm light years away from being mature. I don't even know what it means to be mature. Does it mean putting away the posters that cover your bedroom walls? Or stop calling everyone "dude"? Or stop reading books about vampires and werewolves? Maybe its about making amends with people who you didn't get along with when you were a kid or getting back in touch with that good friend you once had. And instead of those childish trips to the mall, you're suppose to go to coffee shops and talk about politics and other grown up stuff.

As much as I want to live a care free life, I'm going to have to make choices and one day I'm going to have to support myself. This shit terrifies the hell outta me. I don't want to grow up. I like my batman poster and superman movies and I love Smallville and vampire books. I want to live a different life, and I want to grow up and enter the real world, but part of me is too scared the leave my four walls of comfort.

I don't know how to being growing up. I can't do simple things like let go of high school grudges. I can't say things to people who I care about because I can't seem to put my pride aside. I log on to apply for teachers college, and I just freeze. Is that what I want? What else can I do with a freaking sociology major? I've limited myself in the worse possible way. Oh yea, I don't even like kids!!!

Here's what I think it is. I'm too damn lazy. I'm too lazy to fill out those damn forms. I'm too lazy too push myself to be something more. I live my life hoping that everything will just work out and unfold on its own. THAT'S why I'm a sociology major at York. THAT'S why I'm so confused. Laziness and fear. Two evil blood sucking demons!

Oh and on a brighter note, my family implied that my biological clock is now starting to tick so I better get on it. Then they asked me if I want to celebrate my 21st. HA!! The beginning of the end is starting and they want me to call on a celebration???? I think not :|

Pondering 2oo8

"It is one of the blessings of old friends that you can afford to be stupid with them."- Ralph Waldo Emerson


Fixed, boring, dead conversations. Really, I hear the crickets chirping under the ground, under the 20 centimeters of snow.

Same thing, same questions. Their either lifeless and humorless, or just really disgusting.

It's not that I don't know what a good conversation is, because I do. I use to have them, but they seem so long ago. So long ago that I can't even remember what the hell they were about. However, I do remember that I enjoyed them, and that I miss them.

You can try so hard to keep a balance of liveliness and humor. You can put all this effort into keeping the other person captivated. That's where the problem is; when you have to try, it isn't there.

If there's one thing I've learned over the course of 2008, it's that you can't force friendship, and you can't force something that isn't there. You can lie to yourself and pretend that things are the way you want it to be, but really, you're just kidding yourself in the end.

Friendship comes naturally, you either bond with someone, or you don't. That's why best friends are best friends, they know what to say to each other. They know when to be harsh and when to be sympathetic. Their the ones who you can get into a fight with, and make up with without having to say a word.

I'd like to believe in what I'm rambling about, and for the most part the friendships that I've had over the years have proven my theory to be right. Yet I still question this, because what about that one friend who you told everything too? The one who you spent hours on the phone with every night just talking about stuff? Like just stuff...anything and everything? What happens when you fall apart from them and you can't seem to find your way back? How does that happen? You have this bond with someone for over 5 years, then it feels like they've disappeared. But they haven't gone anywhere, they're right where they always were, you just can't bring yourself to say what you need to say to them. Does this void the whole friendship theory? Or is it just an exception? Can you try to make the friendship come back? If you put effort will it be the way it was before? Or is what you once had gone forever?

How often do we let that one special person go? People around you have these ideas of what the two of you are. Some people try and break that apart, and even succeed. Then their the ones who give advice on how to fix things, but hell, if it were so easy don't they think it would have been done already? I'm holding back on saying what needs to be said, because I'm terrified of trying. I don't want to try, I want it to be there. I want to just be able to say "hey, long time", and have everything be alright again.


You can speak over and over again, but you'll never be heard until someone listens.